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Showing posts from April, 2012

I don't understand how people have a problem with homosexuality.

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Look at this. it’s a motherfucking gay pride sheep.
LOOK AT IT. IT’S SO HAPPY.
Prancing about supporting gay rights.
If a sheep can do it, why can’t people?
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Because of you.

Before you it's been awhile before I slipped up.Before you I never thought to give a fuck. Before you I was satisfied on my own. Before you I never let myself go. Before this I was always on the wrong side. Before this I was always bad at hanging onto pride. But before this I was professional about how to hide. What was going on on the inside.

          And before you I was so content. Yeah before you I was unaware of it; I was unaware of my loneliness.

          Now because of you I remember why I have no self respect. Because of you I remember why I always felt hopeless. I remember why My perception of love was demented, I remember why I'm such a mess; Why I'm such a mess. Because of you I remember why I was satisfied with lust. Because of you I remember why I will never truly trust. Before you there were more yous and I know now why I will never expect much. Thought I forgot, but thanks a lot cause now because of you, I remember why I don't love. I remember…
I promise you (I promise) that the evening will blow kisses on your fingertips and make the skin around your lips soft again. When all this started I didn’t mean to fingerprint my mistakes into your spine, cripple you down to where I was sitting upon a fiery nest of all my anger and all my pride, hubris in the worst of worst ways in that it was damaging the strings that tied me to your love and I didn’t even notice the frays until the twines snapped in my face. Now there are hairline fractures on the left side of our chests and you tell me that I’m seeing things, but I’m not, and even after I reach up to rub the illusions out of my eyelids they’re still there; and it doesn’t matter how long I fog up the glass with the stuttering breath held in my furious lungs, it doesn’t matter how many circles I wipe with desperate sleeves that chafe my wrists- they won’t go away. And you’re hurting me, too- you’re not breaking my heart yet but you’re breaking the touch of my eyes and…
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I get him to do things through spells, you know?, if he’s not gonna do it, I just throw it like ‘you will brush your teeth!’

The spells come really useful.  Nell does spells back to me.  She’s always turning me into a mouse or a frog and yeah… doesn’t want to change me back.
Freethinkers are those who are willing to use their minds without prejudice and without fearing to understand things that clash with their own customs, privileges, or beliefs. This state of mind is not common, but it is essential for right thinking…
I certainly believe we all suffer damage, one way or another. How could we not, except in a world of perfect parents, siblings, neighbors, companions? And then there is the question, on which so much depends, of how we react to the damage: whether we admit it or repress it, and how this affects our dealings with others. Some admit the damage and try to mitigate it; some spend their lives trying to help others who are damaged; and then there are those whose main concern is to avoid further damage to themselves, at whatever cost. And those are the ones who are ruthless, and the ones to be careful of.
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Cause on a whim, I might just kiss you;
I don't know, I might just tell you:
I should go, before I come undone.

Gotta walk away, or we might both have issues.
Stay away, but I might miss you;
why is this song better left unsung?
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Go after her.

Fuck, don't sit there and wait for her to call, go after her because that's what you should do if you love someone, don't wait for them to give you a sign cause it might never come, don't let people happen to you.

Don't let her happen to you. She's not a fucking television show or a tornado.
There are people I might have loved; had they gotten on the airplane or run down the street after me or called me up drunk at four in the morning because they need to tell me right now and because they cannot regret this and I always thought that I'd be the only on doing crazy things for people who would never give enough of a fuck to do it back or to act like idiots or be entirely vulnerable and honest and making someone fall in love with you is easy and flying 3000 miles on four days notice because you can't just sit there and do nothing and breathe into telephones is not everyone's idea of love but it is the way I can recognise it because that that is what I …
“I’m not an easy person to love. There are lots of times when I’m a very good boyfriend, but there are times when I’m useless. I’m a mess around the house. I talk nonstop. I become obsessed with things — fantasy football, most recently. And she loves me for my oddness, my awkwardness, all of those things that I hate about myself.” - Daniel Radcliffe
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Wanderlust.

noun
1. The desire to be absolutely anywhere other than where you currently are. (but hidden within a seemingly polite word.)

"Love and never stop; dream and never leave."

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If you're dying, suddenly everybody loves you.
Why don't your try loving that person when they're being themselves.
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Me, half a year ago.

See the elastics around her wrist? That's not a fashion statement. See the lighter she's always playing with? That's not because she likes the colours. See the pencil sharpener she keeps staring at? She's not looking at the shavings caught in it. You see the blank stares? That's not from a lack of sleep. You see those cuts along her arm? The cat didn't do them. You see the smile on her lips? She's just good at faking it.
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"you can't fix your mistakes. Once people are dead, you can't make them undead."

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Don't stop chasing.

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I think that one of the biggest reason why relationships do not work out in the long run is because at one point, one side (or both) stops trying. Before one claims another person as their significant other, they would do anything to make that person happy. They would chase, they would flirt, they would be charming. They would send daily morning and goodnight texts every time you wake up or go to sleep. They would write corny messages and pick up lines just to make sure that there is a smile upon your face. But once they claim you as theirs, all of those things eventually stop. The 5 page texts slowly turn into 1. The constant calls turn into not calling at all. And the lovely endearments turn into daily arguments. In order for a relationship to work, don’t ever stop chasing. Just because the person you want is now consider “yours”, it does not mean they deserve anything less than the time when you’re trying to win them over.
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Gratitude

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I think that the number one cause of pain on a human's heart is lack of gratitude. I know it sounds a bit odd and a bit far-fetched but here me out for a second.

Most things in our lives come and go, a lot like a wave that stretches with the tide. We move, we make friends, we loser lovers, we pass through wonderful moments.

For most of us, we associate loss as a sad and horrible thing. Once something we love has slipped through our fingers, we can't help but feel the empty hole in our lives where it once stood. Even when it's all said and done, and we've finally moved on from whatever we have lost that was so beautiful, we still feel it.

But I've learned the truth.
A small and beautiful truth that has made my heart rejoice in even the most disheartening of times. The truth; is that if we are sincerely grateful for the things that we love most in this life, when we lose them, we can still function. Because we are simply grateful that we had them at all.

It no longe…
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Dear girl without hope,

"How do you have so much hope? Don't you ever feel tired of being let down? Doesn't it hurt?"

I have so much hope cause I know how it feels like to not have hope at all. And that feeling is terrifying. Absolutely horrifying. Being let down is a part of life, that is why I don't expect the most of everything. Stick to this: "Hope for the best, but expect the worst." You can't avoid being disappointed in life, in some way, at some point, you will be disappointed. And of course it hurts, it will always hurt. No matter how many times you've been disappointed, it will always hurt when it happens again. It is inevitable.
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If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work: 'Hello. Can't work today, still queer.'

-Robin Tyler, US gay rights activist.
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“They told me the big black Lab’s name was Reggie, as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, no-kill, and the people really friendly. I’d only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open. Everyone waves when you pass them on the street.
But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn’t hurt. Give me someone to talk to. And I had just seen Reggie’s advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn’t look like “Lab people,” whatever that meant. They must’ve thought I did.

But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, which consisted of a dog pad, bag of toys almost all of which were brand new tennis balls, his dishes and a sealed letter from his previous owner.

See, Reggie and I di…
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"You can do better. You deserve so much more.”

In reality, you’re right. But sometimes when you love, you love the person for who they are despite what they’ve done wrong to you. That’s what love does to you. It’s not about whom you deserve, it’s about whom you want, whom you need, and whom you love. If someone breaks your heart, just punch them in the face. Oh sure, it seems obvious now, but you’d be amazed at how many people don’t think of it when it’s relevant.

Seriously, just punch them in the face and go get some ice cream.

Note to all girls: If a guy breaks up with you in anyway besides in person, he was never really worth it all along. Just know that you deserve better.

— Chris Martin on the inspiration for ‘Fix You’

She came home from the hospital after her father passed covered in tears. I started crying and kept asking her ‘What can I do for you? Tell me how I can help.’ And she looked up at me and said ‘Just hold me..’cause you’re the only thing that can fix me right now.’

Stay positive evn when it feels like your life is falling apart.

I know you may be thinking, easy for you to say, you don't even know what I'm going through.

And that is very true. I do not know what you're going through or what you have been through and I am in no position to judge you.

But I do know that you are an amazing and courageous and a very strong person, and that you deserve to be loved unconditionally by someone who will never ever turn their backs on you, no matter what. And I also know that you are strong enough to overcome your problem even though it may seem like there is no hope left anymore.

And I know that no matter what you think or say or feel or do, someone will be or is very lucky to have you.

Hold on. Stay strong. Keep fighting.
You're worth it, I promise.

Remembrance day of the Holocaust.

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This is one of the most haunting photos I have ever seen. It is hundreds of wedding rings that were removed from those in Concentration Camps.

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Let it be.

There is really no easy answer to the question of why people do the things they do. They just do. We’re always looking for an explanation of some sort, maybe because it’s comforting in a way. However, knowledge can bring with it a sort of stinging pain that can’t be easily forgotten. People have their reasons for doing what they do. Sometimes we don’t know what that reason is, sometimes they don’t either. Why not let it be? It’s simpler than complicating the situation by trying to quench our curiosities. It is perhaps one of the very few times ignorance can be considered to be sheer bliss.

Definitely.

Sometimes I wonder if people are meant to walk out of our lives as easily as they walked in. Is it truly hard to let someone go, or do we, as humans, hold onto that pain as a reminder of the “better times” we had together? We torment ourselves with memories of laughter, only to be brought back to reality and have the feeling of being thrown head first into a wall all over again. 

We can be hypnotized to quit smoking or even to sleep better, but we can’t forget a person’s eyes, or the way their hand felt holding yours. What about the stab in the chest when they up and walked away? Or the stab in the back from the person you thought was your friend? I wonder if people purposely hold onto people who refuses to participate in their lives and live with the pain pounding at their chest.

Or at the end of it all, we are a lot stronger than we think we are? 
I’d like to think so. And that’s a nice thought.
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On June 11th 1963, Thích Quảng Đức, a Vietnamese Buddhist monk, sat down in the middle of a busy intersection in Saigon, covered himself in gasoline and He tfact that Duc did not make a sound while burning to death. Đức was protesting President Ngô Đình Diệm’s administration for oppressing the Buddhist religion.hen ignited a match, and set himself on fire. Đức burned to death in a matter of minutes, and he was immortalized in a famous photograph taken by a reporter who was in Vietnam in order to photograph the war. All those who saw this spectacle were taken by the the fact that Duc did not make a sound while burning to death. Đức was protesting President Ngô Đình Diệm’s administration for oppressing the Buddhist religion.

"You have the right to leave someone. But at least tell them why, cause what’s even more painful than being abandoned; is knowing you’re not worth an explanation."

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I used to constantly look for people to replace you. Someone to talk to everyday, someone to trust, someone to believe in, someone to love, someone to have the time of my life with. I stopped though. I learned some people really can’t be replaced.
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When bad things happen to genuinely good people I know, it makes me want defy all logic and switch places with them until everything is good again for them like it’s supposed to be.
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Do what makes you happy and not what makes other people happy.

Live for yourself as well as others. Life is too short to be living with regrets, life is too short to care about what other people think about you. If you are happy with who you are and what you do, then that is all that matters. Opinions from those who don’t matter to you personally, shouldn’t matter at all. Live your life the way that you want to. Don’t dwell on the past, it’s there for a reason. Remember to always stay true to who you are no matter what anyone else says about you, in the end, you know who you really are whereas they don’t. Don’t let anyone bring you down in life, because you have every right to be happy and every right to be here. Never let anyone make you feel any less of yourself because you don’t deserve it. Don’t ever second guess how beautiful you are, how handsome you are, on the outside as well as on the inside.

Treat your body with respect, don’t take everything out on yourself. Don’t runaway from your problems, face them. You are much stronger than you th…
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Def Poetry: Sarah Kay

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"I don’t want to turn any of this into poetry but you’re so beautiful flowers turn their heads to smell you."

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In my skewed mind, I am a dancer. There are rainbows shoring the bottom of my feet and my arms are made of opaque feathers and dripping dew.  I wish I could sink my fingers into the golden curve of happiness but my footholds are loose and they crumble with the weight of my hopes.

I wonder if you’d notice if I crumbled to dust and flittered away with the morning breeze.

I imagine that the sadness rotting away in the bottom of my stomach is coloured the same ashy grey as your soul and I wish I could chisel away at its edges with a hammer and break through with beams of sunny light.

I want to be a cloud. I want to be a bird. I want to be away.

I wonder if you can feel my inadequacy because I feel it. Like a parasitic growth in the bottom of my stomach and my mind, it decays me from the inside out and one day I’ll become a shape. My fingers will draw circles in the heavens and my hands will mould the linings of a cloud but one day my mind will turn to dust and you will wonder where I’ve g…
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Dear One Who No Longer Knows The Answers,

"Dear whom it may concern, what is love without loss? Could you tell me when love is no longer enough? Could you tell me the difference between someone who loves too fiercely that they can't articulate what they want and someone who no longer has anything to say for there is no love left in them? Could you tell me if giving up for another is the lack of love or the overwhelming presence of love? Could you? Would you? Please? 
With utter sincerity, one who no longer knows the answers."

I wish I could tell you all these things. I wish I could give you these answers you seek. If I could tell you all the things I know, I would. But I can’t, because I’m still trying to figure out them myself. Of course, they vary from person to person and circumstances to circumstances and even then the human capacity to love in all ways is an entire enigma in itself and I do not claim have solved that particular mystery just yet, if ever. Life is just one big question and isn’t that why we se…
If I ever even thought that you resented me for depending on you the way I did, then I wouldn’t have continued to do so.
All this time I thought you knew that I trusted you enough to discuss things with you I don’t normally talk to other people about, and I do, but I just never would’ve imagined that you would ever feel like it’s all you were to me- because it’s not.
I’m sorry I have so many problems.
I’m sorry that I don’t know how to get rid of my sadness.
I’m sorry that I suck at establishing relationships with people and keeping them and I’m sorry it’s so difficult to hang out with me because you think I’m going to burst into tears any second and that it’s hard to simply laugh with me about nothing in particular because there’s so many things hanging on my mind.
I’m sorry that I depend on you so much when I’m upset.
Most of all I’m sorry that you feel that I don’t care for you as anything other than someone to be there whenever I’m about to lose it. When in reality, you meant more…
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A list of things to remember:

Every person you meet is not going to love you, they may not even like you. Migratory birds always find their way back home. Even at its darkest, the sky is never entirely black. Reading a book from your childhood will make you the happiest.Collecting beautiful things might make them more beautiful.Collecting beautiful things might take away their light (fireflies, pieces of the moon, daisies, stardust.)Each vein you trace will somehow find its way back to your heart. Butterflies weigh as little as two rose petals. The moonflower opens in mid to late afternoon and blooms right through the night. When the sun rises in the morning, the moonflower dies and another is born that exact time the next afternoon. You are your own zenith. “You cannot save people, you can only love them.” - Anais Nin. No one is ever, ever entirely alone
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"It’s like trying not to breathe. At first, you think you can do it. But when it comes right down to it, you just can’t."

Let me guess.

You want to know why I tried to kill myself.
You want to know how I survived. Why I wanted to disappear. Where I wanted to be all this time. But first, why I tried to kill myself, right?

It's okay. People do. They measure themselves against me. It's me. It's like this line is drawn somewhere in the world and if you never cross it, you'll never consider throwing yourself off a building or swallowing a bottle of pills - but if you do, you might. People figured I crossed the line. They ask themselves, "Could I ever get as close as she did?"

The truth it, there is no line. There's only your life, how you mess it up, and who is there to save you.

Or who isn't.
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I’m not fascinated by people who smile all the time. What I find interesting is the way people look when they are lost in thought, when their face becomes angry or serious, when they bite their lip, the way they glance, the way they look down when they walk, when they are alone and smoking a cigarette, when they smirk, the way they half smile, the way they try and hold back tears, the way when their face says they want to say something but can’t, the way they look at someone they want or love. I love the way people look when they do these things. It’s… beautiful

"and my heart caves in when i look at you."

“What is your favourite word?”
“And. It is so hopeful.”
stop.
It's such a shame that you just said all those things because now I see that you have no idea of what I'm going through nor do you seem  to care enough to find out how I feel.
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